The cure for unhappiness
I've been thinking a lot lately about this post. Seeing friends and family going through tough times and hearing over and over again the question "Why am I still not happy?" has pushed me to finally go ahead with it.
"I have a good life, I have stresses like everyone else but I should be generally grateful, but why on earth do I wake up everyday feeling this Unhappy?" - Does this sound familiar? If yes, then read on to know why, and most importantly how to fix it.
Let me start by assuring you, Happiness comes from within. When you are in a state of constant negativity and dissatisfaction with life its hard to believe this. How can it come from within when within is this unhappy?
Well, there are two steps, first identifying your reasons for unhappiness, and secondly fostering conditions where happiness can grow.
Reasons for Unhappiness
You constantly compare yourselves to others
The more you define yourself, success, looks by what others have, the more it would be impossible to keep up and you will constantly feel a sense of failure. This constant feeling of competitiveness which sometimes leads to jealousy will always surround you with negativity. Pay attention to how much you compare yourselves to others, and drop this habit now.
You're in debt
Money issues can really place a lot of stress on us. When you are constantly reminded that you owe money you feel bad about yourself. Just set a plan for paying off debts and start even with the smallest of amounts and you will instantly feel better.
You hate your job
We spend most of the day's hours in our job and so when you hate it, then you are spending a large amount of your day being unhappy. But remember, you do have the power to change that. Can you ask for different responsibilities? Can you take this discussion with your manager? or even start searching for another job? This will all give you a sense of power that will instantly make you feel better.
You feel fat/skinny/not beautiful enough
In today's world with crazy beauty standards, appearance consciousness became more common than ever. You dont get to meet one person who either wants or trying to change something about the they look. Truth is however, if you look around you, you will find most people are in fact, average looking. Especially compared to the unrealistic beauty measures defined by models, lifestyle magazines and celebrities. Just trying to take care of yourself, your skin, your health, exercising, eating better, dressing well, will make you feel and look better.
You aren't taking care of your health
If you don't feel OK physically, it will take a toll on your state of my mind. If you don't get enough sleep, if you are spending too many hours working, drinking too many cups of coffee and eating junk food, you will continue to feel unhappy. You need to take steps towards a healthier life style. Take home cooked lunches with you to work, join a gym, or even take a walk to work instead of the car. Whatever steps you take will make you feel much more positive.
You focus too much on materialistic things
The longing for more money and more materialistic things in life can cause a sense of dissatisfaction which leads to constant unhappiness. Just remember, money and new "toys" cause temporary happiness but then you will quickly get bored and start looking for the next big thing to get or your next higher income. Instead, savor relationships, happy moments with your friends and fam, and appreciate things that money cant buy for those are what boosts real happiness.
Continue to count your blessings: Look around you everyday and count the blessings you have. It maybe your relationship, your kids, or the fact that you are single and enjoying it. Having your family around or loads of friends who love you...those are the things that money cant buy.
Practice acts of kindness: When you give back and do things that positively impact others, you feel happier. Its a human instinct so embrace it and do more of it.
Forgive and forget: Letting go of anger and grudge whenever possible is a huge contributor to happiness and gratitude.
Nurture your relationships: Our relationships are key to life happiness. Who are the most important people in your life? Reach out to those people, in addition to distant friends and families and start cultivating those relations.
Finally, imagine happiness, everyday: Wake up and smile. it sounds weird but it works. When you smile, you instantly set your mood on "happy" and when you sit for 5 more minutes and imagine happiness, your day going smoothly by, everything falling into place...then you set a happy state of mind that surrounds you with positive vibes for the rest of your day. #behappy