The Courage To Change
I must have dreaded this day for months, if not years...coming to think of it, I must have feared it from the very first moment I joined. You see, corporates have a funny way like that; it tends to make you dislike it but then again you love it too much and you get attached to it in a way that you always feel you want to leave but you are afraid to go all the same.
I am one of those people who cant spend a day in my life without work. I tend to think that as a person my mind will die out if I dont use it every single day to finish tasks, plan projects and solve issues. This is why I fell in love with corporate life ever since college...precisely when one day I saw a bunch of polished white collars coming out of their Multi-National corporation building, holding fancy cups of coffee, wearing palettes of Black, White and Grey suits and looking engaged in a serious conversation that only indicates a tough project in hand. I looked at them in awe and immediately my brain was set, "One day; this will be me".
Soon enough, on my graduation day, I got a call confirming I was chosen for a job at one of the largest and most respected European Multi-National corporation in the entire world. I was exhilarated yet scared to death. Seeking guidance and comfort, on the night of my first day, I sat down with dad and I still remember his advice vividly, "You are now entering the most challenging period of your life...While some girls at your age (21) choose to do their minimum and just have fun, you chose to work...For that, too, you will have two choices - Either you play now and pay later, or you pay now and play later - knowing you, I know which one you will go for"
The next day, with a fire of motivation burning through my chest and a mind set on "paying now", I moved ahead and marched through the massive building, and into my future. I worked day in and day out like there is no tomorrow. I was hungry to learn, to grow, to know more, to do better every single minute of the day, my mind was set, I knew I was born to succeed, to elevate, and to keep moving forward without any obstacle scaring or hurdling me.
8 years, 8 managers, and 3 countries later...I felt the walls around me do not light the same fire of motivation anymore. It was nothing that happened, I just woke up one day and recognized that I have grown too comfortable to this place. I solve the issues with a half sleepy brain and plan projects that started to feel all the same for me. I knew it...It was time to change.
The only missing factor was the courage, it must have taken me an entire year to master the courage to leave. The courage to change. For you see, change can be as scary as marching through a dead dark tunnel with a sound of howling at the other end. You keep imagining the worst of it as you dont exactly know what does it indicate. It can be the sound of a scary animal waiting to take you down, and end your life right then and there or it can be the sound of a howling wind, through a beautiful door open to the most stunning view you will ever see in a world full of new endless possibilities.
I finally did it. I found my courage to change...and while I had a mix of emotions for a few weeks before leaving, I now feel incredibly relieved. What's more is that this old feeling of excitement that fills my heart for what the future holds for me is back, exactly like my 21 year old self felt years ago!
This story, is one of the millions of stories we encounter everyday. Its about the dilemma of finding the Courage to Change.
Courage is not only to recognize when it is time to move forward, to change, to leave this present behind us, but to gather the nerves, ignore the butterflies in your stomach, and to mute the sound of the howling on the other end of the dark tunnel. To take the step, utter the words that signify the end of the current and the beginning of the next and...change.
Your heart will tell you, your mind will send you the signals...if you feel you are suffocating in a relationship, you hate what you are doing, or even feel too comfortable and lost your motivation, just remind yourself why you married that person or worked at that place to begin with. And if the reason does not seem all together relevant to you anymore...then you know its time to find your happiness once again and gather that Courage to Change. #behappy