5 habits to #behappy
“Any day above the ground is a great day”
I am not a girl who normally takes her inspirations from rappers (Pitbull in that case), but as I was driving down the road thinking of how to answer one of my friends earlier question; “How do I become a more positive and a happier person?” this song popped into the radio and the statement rang a bell.
“Any day above the ground is a great day”
While this statement is a starting point, it is by no mean the end of it.
A few years ago, I was feeling older and older every day. I woke up with such a heavy feeling and as I went on with my day I felt drained out of energy. I was still in my early 20's, all my vitals were great, so what seemed to be the issue?
Little by little I started noticing the impact of certain actions, people or places on me. I took a decision to change it immediately and simply become happier.
Being happy, positive, the half-full persona…doesn't come easy for everyone. Sometimes it runs within the brood; your grandma or your father…they both tend to exaggerate everything and look at the “What if” and not from the sunny side. Sometimes it’s a result of a strong trauma or a series of bad incidents that led you to become a less than a positive person.
So if you are looking for a little bit more laughter, positivity and happiness in your life, here are my very humble, tried and tested habits to #behappy. Because what's sexier than a happy girl's genuine laugh?!
Wake up and smile like a crazy person
I heard this one many times before, but the minute I decided that I needed to inject some positivity into my life, I was up for trying anything. I did, and it worked! How you start your day has a lot more impact on the rest of your day way more than you think. Here is what you gotta do:
- Smile the minute you open your eyes and keep smiling for a few minutes
- Remind yourself of one thing that happened the previous day that you are happy or grateful for
- Think of one thing in the day ahead that you are looking forward to and keep focused on this one thing all day
Make someone else happy
“What you do tend to get back to you somehow.”
For me, making others happy is always much more rewarding and what keeps you remembered long after you are gone, but it’s not only about giving. In our world, the way you treat others and how you think of them also tend to have a big effect on how you respect and think about yourself. So we need to give value and constantly spread positivity so we can get it back:
- Help out. Give a friend a ride in your car, help them while moving or even google info for them when they are lost. Whatever you do, just lend a helping hand.
- Listen. Sometimes people don’t want any direct help. They just want someone to be there fully and listening as they vent for a little while.
- Boost the mood. Smile. Give hugs. Play uplifting music when hanging out with a friend or suggest a funny movie for your movie night. Encourage someone who has had a bad day or are going through a tough time to keep moving forward.
What’s not to love about a whole half of a filled glass?
We don’t see things as they are; we see them as we are. There is always always always a positive side to every bad situation and you need to teach yourself how to look at the half-full. Can’t see it just yet? Start by asking yourself two questions:
- What is the one thing that is positive or good about this situation?
- What is the one opportunity you can seize from this situation?
Lost your job? People somewhere in the world survive with $1 and less a day so if you have 20 you are 20 times luckier than a LOT of people! Also, maybe that’s the push you needed to get started on that private business you always wanted to…
Learn to deal with bad criticism
Probably the number one fear we all have as humans; the fear of being criticized. It can hold you back from doing what you want in life. I must have postponed starting this blog for years just for the fear of criticism. Negativity flowing out of someone’s mouth (or through the gossip vein) and it being about you can hurt can impact your mood and even confidence. But the key is learning to handle it in a healthy way.
- Calm down. When you are angry, take at least a couple of deep breaths or a little time to process the message before you respond.
- Listen carefully to what is being said. Remain level-headed and figure out how this message can help you before anything. Ask yourself: Is there one thing I can learn from what is being said? Is it consistent coming out from various people? Is there something here that I may not want to hear but could help me?
- Remember its almost never about you. Some criticism is helpful but in my experience most are simply attacks or someone lashing out because they are having bad day, year, job or relationship. To lessen the sting of such criticism – often really angry or overly critical in an nonconstructive way – try to be understanding. Consider that this person might not be feeling so good at the moment.
- Reply or let go. Regardless of the content try to keep your reply kind. You can ask a question or two to get more specific feedback if you want. And if they don’t reply or simply gotten a nasty attack then it is time to delete it and to let that situation go.
Boot all negativity out of your life
From my own experience, one of the most important milestones in my life was getting rid of the most negative influences in it. No one is perfect—and perfection isn't the goal when it comes to becoming happier —but a few years back there were people in my life who were consistently negative, who constantly brought me down, and I had to stop spending so much time with them. It wasn't easy, but it had to be done gradually.
On the other hand, I had to take a step back and examine which behaviors were good for me and which were not and stop those negative behaviors or activities I felt were only hurting me. So I taught myself to gradually focus on the positive things I was doing – Writing, reading, exercising - and let go of the negative ones.
Surround yourself with positive happy people, meditate or pray and take some time everyday for yourself, do things that makes you happy and keeps you positive, call your parents, text your distant cousin, make up with this ex-friend, don't delay work tasks or shopping for grocery...always remember what’s great about you and keep reminding yourself everyday...because that – my friend - is the guaranteed way to #behappy.